The Impact of You Page 12

Page 12

 

  I set my tray on the table, but remain standing in front of them. “What? Will you two just spit it out?”

  Noah places his hand on Madison’s, telling her he’s got this. “We just think you need to be careful. Jase could be playing some kind of game with you. And you’re bound to fall for him, spending so much alone time with him. ”

  Maybe I should take their intervention as concern, but for some reason, it just annoys me. “Is it so impossible that Jase really likes me? How many other girls has he brought home for the weekend to meet his mom? Did you ever think maybe this is something different between us?”

  Noah holds up his hands in surrender. “Alright. We love you. We support you. As long as you’ve thought it through. ”

  Madison smiles weakly and I can tell they’re mentally deciding to pick up the pieces when I get dumped.

  “Fine. ” I slide into the seat and stab at the food on my plate. Do they know something I don’t? Is this all going to blow up in my face like they think?

  By Tuesday afternoon, I’m looking forward to human sexuality class if only to see Jase. Professor Gibbs’ lecture is about self-love, i. e. , masturbation – a topic I’m decidedly uncomfortable with. Sure, I’ve tried it, but I don’t get the hoopla. He discusses the importance of communication with your partner and part of that effective communication is first understanding your body and its needs. I am so damn uncomfortable during the entire lecture that by the time class is over, I escape out the doors, Jase’s deep chuckle making the hairs on the back of my neck rise as he follows me.

  I slip into our regular booth while Jase orders the coffee. I get my blushing under control by the time he returns, delivering a cup of coffee to me with a smirk.

  He sits down across from me, his eyes playfully dancing on mine. I brace myself for the embarrassing comment he’s sure to make from the lecture. Only he doesn’t. His eyes grow serious and he leans in toward me, his unique scent of cologne and fabric softener greeting me. “You sure you’re okay with what happened between us last weekend?”

  I swallow. “Why wouldn’t I be?” I want to appear, cool, effortlessly sexy, and easy going. Too bad I’m a bundle of nerves, gripping the table in front of me for support, ready to melt into a puddle on the floor with the way Jase is looking at me.

  His voice drops an octave lower. “Because I’m willing to lend my services…to extend your assignments into a gray area I’ve nicknamed Operation Avery’s First Orgasm. ”

  Eek! I was hoping he’d forgotten that comment I’d made at the coffee shop, but clearly he hasn’t. I clamp my thighs together and remind myself to breathe. There are no words for the tingles Jase can send through my body with only his deep, sexy voice. That certainly never happened with my high school boyfriend, Brent.

  “Whistle? You okay?” He takes my hand and absently traces his thumb across my palm. “Breathe for me, okay. ”

  I pull in a ragged breath, still unable to speak.

  His cocky smile is back. “Just think about it, babe. ”

  I manage a nod.

  Jase takes a sip from his coffee, his eyes still watching mine over the brim of the cup. “There’s something I don’t understand,” he says, running a hand through his messy hair. “You said you had a high school boyfriend, and you guys were pretty serious…”

  Oh God, I can’t have him asking questions about Brent. “Uh huh. ”

  “And yet, you’ve never…” He raises his eyebrows. “So I take it you guys never messed around?”

  I feel like I’m having an out of body experience. I can’t believe Jase wants to talk about my past…love life, or lack thereof. This is crazy. I feel like I’m floating above us, watching, preparing to witness my demise. “We experimented a little, but never had sex. ”

  He frowns. “And no orgasms for you?”

  “Why are you so obsessed with my non-orgasmic status? Some girls just don’t have them, okay?”

  “Um, no. That is most definitely not okay with me. ”

  I roll my eyes. “Madison said I probably would have if he… never mind. ” I need a muzzle. Seriously, I should be shot. The things he’ll get me to admit to….

  Jase pins me with an icy glare. “If he what?”

  “Used his mouth,” I squeak out. It wasn’t actually how she’d put it, but I wouldn’t use those rude words to describe it.

  “And he wouldn’t?” Jase’s eyes widen.

  I shake my head. “He said he didn’t do that. ”

  Jase throws his head back in disgust, groaning as his eyes roll back in his head. “Any guy who has a policy against that is a fucking idiot. ”

  The nervous waves crashing inside me erupt into an all-out frenzy with this information. Jase’s opinion on oral sex shouldn’t ignite my sex-drive, make my skin tingle, or heat my lady parts, yet that’s exactly what happens.

  His expression grows dark, more serious as he leans in closer. “Baby, if you let me, I wouldn’t come up for a week. ”

  Holy. Crap.

  Chapter 16

  Avery

  The email sitting in my inbox is taunting me, distracting me in the most wondrous way. It’s a follow-up from the adoption agency. It’s a simple, three-line email, but the news it contains is about to change my life. They’ve confirmed that they mailed the information about my birth mother to my dorm address. I even have a tracking number to chart the package’s progress if I want.

  I shove away from my desk, unable to stare at the words any longer. I need to get dressed anyway, and finish drying my hair. Madison’s humming to herself as she applies the rest of her makeup in front of the full-length mirror, completely oblivious to my inner turmoil. Now that the information is on its way, it feels like a ticking time bomb, surely set to explode in my face once it finds me. I suppose I don’t have to open it if I don’t want to. Who am I kidding? Of course I’ll open it. I’ve waited nineteen years to know this information. No matter what happens, something inside me needs to know.

  Mitch never called, not that I care. I’d rather be with Jase anyway. I put my hair up in a ponytail, knowing there will be no taming its crazy tonight, and check my outfit in the mirror. Dark skinny jeans, ballet flats and a simple white silk top, rolled at the elbows. I add a few colorful beaded necklaces and call it good.

  “You look pretty. ” Madison smiles at my reflection. She has a date tonight, but she’s being surprisingly cool and level-headed about me going to the Delta Sig party.

  “Thanks. You look smokin’. ” Her little purple dress and cowgirl boots couldn’t be more adorable. I would totally need to borrow those at some point.

  She pulls me in for an unexpected hug. “Jase better know how great you are. He does anything to mess this up, I’ll feed him his balls,” she says, patting my back.

  I nod silently. I don’t tell her that I’m probably going to be the one to mess things up.

  When I reach the house, I’m happy to see Jase was right. It’s a low key party compared to their usual bashes. Tonight is close friends only. There are about thirty people there, spread out in the living room and kitchen, mingling and talking against the backdrop of low music. It’s a totally different vibe than their usual raging parties. It’s nice.

  Unfortunately, Stacia is one of the few guests here. She grins at me coyly. I know she hates my friendship with Jase, and I hate her very existence. It’s a strange thing that all of that is communicated in a single glance shared between us.

  I find Jase in the kitchen, a bottle of beer dangling from his hand, and a cool, easy smile on his lips as he talks to Trey. I take a moment just to admire him across the room. It’s nice to see him relaxed like this. His hip is leaning against the counter, his feet crossed at the ankles. HisT-shirt is a size too small and hugs his biceps nicely. I let out a contented sigh and saunter toward him.

  Jase’s eyes find mine and his smile widens. “Whistle! Get your hot ass over here. ” He reaches for me once I’m close and
pulls me to his side.

  Part of me absolutely loves how close we’re becoming. Part of me is terrified by it. Jase doesn’t yet know my past, and I have no idea how things will pan out when he does. But when the heavy weight of his arm curls around my waist and pulls me close, all my fears vanish. Standing at his side, I can pretend for just a moment that I belong here, that all is okay. I smile at his dumbass friend Trey, tap my feet to the music and gratefully take the can of soda Jase passes me.

  Jase is still watching me, his brilliant blue eyes sparkling. I love the way he looks at me, but it’s getting me all flustered. My eyes reluctantly leave his, only to be assaulted by two sorority girls eagerly making out for show. Gah! I can’t un-see that. Yes, because I wanted to develop eye-cancer tonight.

  “I’ll be right back. I’m just gonna run to the bathroom. ” All these overdressed girls have me wanting to go check my reflection.

  Jase nods and removes his warm arm from my waist.

  I round the corner and run smack into Stacia. She staggers back, her eyes unfocused as she takes me in. Great. She’s drunk again. If she thinks she’s staying the night in Jase’s room, she’s wrong. Hell, I’ll stay there myself just to be sure. The thought makes my stomach flip.

  I plant my hands on my hips, mentally preparing for the showdown she’s intent we have. “Excuse me, can I go by?” I say, struggling to keep my voice calm.

  She rolls her eyes, pointing a manicured finger in my face. “You won’t last, you know. He’ll sleep with you, then move on like he does with all the rest. I’m the only one who sticks around. It’s always been that way and always will be. ”

  I push my shoulders back and fake a confidence I don’t feel. “Back off, Stacia. I’m seeing Jase. Not you. ” Wow, that popped out of nowhere, but maybe it’s at least partially true.

  “Not exclusively,” she returns, batting her eyelashes, leaving me to wonder what the hell she means.

  She’s rendered me momentarily speechless. Bitter words die on my tongue, and I shove my way around her. Fighting my way into the bathroom, I slump against the door and breathe. A pale, wide-eyed girl stares back at me. God! I hate Stacia. I hate that I let her get to me. I don’t know what Jase and I have; I only know I don’t want her having any part of it.

  I give myself a pep-talk, use the restroom, wash my hands and then attempt to rejoin the party. Only I’m stopped in my tracks again, this time by something a million times worse than facing off with Stacia. My stomach drops to my feet.

  Marcy Capri, with the same frizzy blond hair she had in high school, is standing in the hall, deep in conversation with Stacia.

  Shit!

  I slip around the corner before they spot me, my heart staggering and tripping over itself. Every part of me shakes and my head is a mess. I do the only thing I can think to do. I reach in my pocket, drag out my whistle and blow it as hard as I can.

  Chapter 17

  Jase

  The shrill whistle cuts through the air with an insistent blast.

  Avery…

  I shove past bodies to follow the sound and find her alone in the hallway. She’s slumped against the wall, knees drawn up to her chest…and she’s crying. What the fuck?

  I scoop her up in my arms, carry her to the nearby bathroom and lock the door behind us. I set her on the counter and push her hair back from her face. “Avery, baby…Tell me what happened. ”

  She sucks in a shuddering breath, biting her bottom lip. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess. ” She uses the back of her hand to brush the stray tears from her cheeks and looks up at me with a pained expression.

  “Whistle? Did someone touch you? Tell me what happened. ” My blood is pounding in my veins. If someone hurt her, I will lose it.

  She shakes her head. “No, nothing like that. It’s just…I saw someone from my past…remembered things I didn’t want to remember…” Little hiccups rack her chest, and tears still swim in her eyes.

  If I could take away whatever she’s been through, I’d do it. I hate how powerless I feel. “Avery, tell me who he is. Let me handle this. ”

  She swallows down a sob. “Not he. She. And please don’t do anything, it’ll make things worse. ”

  She?

  Fuck. I hate her past; I hate whatever this is that won’t let her move forward. “Avery, talk to me. ”

  “Not about this, please, Jase. Don’t make me. Can we just pretend…for one more night…please?”

  The look in her eyes is breaking my fucking heart. “Tell me what you need. I’ll do it, Whistle, please. Tell me. ”

  She shakes her head. “I can’t tell you, Jase. I don’t know how. ”

  Using two fingers, I tip her chin up. “Then let me make you forget whoever did this to you. Let me help you. ”

  She nods slowly, her green eyes searing mine with their intensity. “Please…”

  She doesn’t say another word, because my lips crash against hers, but a low moan breaks in her throat. This is the only way I know how to help her, and it seems she’s okay with letting me try.

  My fingers find the button on her jeans, my tongue still stroking hers. Despite her fears and warnings about going slow, we both know we’ve been building towards this the entire time. It’s the only weapon in my arsenal to drive her past away. And I will use it. I know of no other way to bring her relief. Operation Avery’s First Orgasm is a Go.

  Avery

  My jeans and panties are at my knees, constricting my movements, but my limited mobility doesn’t hamper Jase any. His fingers find the spot my body needs him most, stroking, rubbing, stopping briefly to wet his fingers with his mouth, then caressing me again. The way his slick fingers slide across my sensitive flesh makes me cry out. He lifts my shirt and pulls down the cups of my bra so I’m exposed, kissing and suckling each of my breasts, his mouth and tongue constantly exploring, keeping rhythm with his fingers that are sending me closer and closer to the edge.