Dirty Little Secret Read online

  Cooper and I remained sitting in Gavin’s office. I finally allowed myself to relax under the warmth of Cooper’s gaze.

  “How are you doing, princess? Can you handle the schedule?”

  Alyssa appeared again in the doorway before I had a chance to reply. “Gavin had to step out. He’ll call you to fill you in, Cooper.” She seemed pleased with herself as she shut the door to the office, leaving us alone in the space that smelled too much like Gavin.

  His voice played back in my head on a loop. Naughty girl. I wondered if he’d used the same words with other women, if he took them on similar dates in his limo with Ben in the front seat.

  Huffing out a deep sigh, I tried to forget what had happened in the back seat. I pushed my salad away on the table, no longer hungry.

  “That bad, huh?” Cooper asked. He was so handsome and sweet.

  “To be honest, it’s all a little overwhelming.”

  I loved that I could tell Cooper how I was feeling. Gavin might be a walking sex bomb, but he was also cocky and rude. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to tell him he could keep his thousand dollars. I’d rather have my self-respect. And given my past, I didn’t trust myself around men like him.

  Maybe it was time to move on and forget this ever happened. Maybe I didn’t need this shit. Maybe I could say I’d only go on dates with Cooper.

  But, who was I kidding? Gavin would haunt my dreams if I didn’t see this through to the end.

  Cooper would never take control like that. He was too . . . what was the word? Polite, respectful? Did that mean that Gavin wasn’t those things? The evidence that I was repeating an unhealthy pattern was mounting.

  “Does that mean you’re out?” Cooper asked, and though his face was impassive, I knew the answer meant a lot to him.

  I shook my head, much to my own surprise. “No. I’m going to make it work. I do need to get going though. I told my coworkers I was running an errand.”

  Cooper smiled and walked me to the door. I stepped out onto the busy sidewalk and noticed a woman glaring at me. Maybe she knew what these offices were for, even though there was no name on the door.

  “Emma.”

  I heard my name and turned to see Gavin standing on the curb in front of the building.

  “What are you doing here? I thought you left,” I said, butterflies exploding into flight in my belly.

  “Damn drivers. Ben is out today, unfortunately.”

  The mention of Ben instantly brought me back to the limo. I could feel my cheeks burning, which earned me a smile from Gavin for the first time today. I tried to swallow the lump building in my throat.

  “Oh, well, see you later.” I turned to walk away but Gavin grabbed my wrist, pulling me back toward him.

  “What’s wrong, little minx?”

  I tried to find the words offensive instead of arousing. It didn’t work.

  “What happened in the limo . . .” My mouth went dry, and I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to ask him for round two or if I ought to tell him it could never happen again. For Cooper’s sake. For the sake of my ever-dwindling dignity.

  “You rode my fingers,” he said quite loudly.

  A man passing by on the sidewalk whipped his head in our direction.

  “You wouldn’t let me touch you, though.” I whispered the words.

  Gavin grinned. “Touching me is a privilege you have to earn.” He stroked his fingertips down my bare arms. “But you’re mine to play with, so I can touch you anytime I want.”

  I let out a small gasp, feeling breathless at his words. What arrogance, and yet I wanted to earn it. I wanted him to touch me anytime he wanted to.

  When I said nothing, warring with myself, he pulled me closer still. God, I loved the feel of him. And damn it if this didn’t make me a whore, but the library was truthfully on the brink of closure. After the hard winter last year, the roof was leaking so badly, we had buckets collecting water. A crew was already hard at work repairing it because of Gavin’s donation. If it weren’t for him, I might not have either of my two jobs at this point.

  Still, that didn’t give him the right to toy with me.

  “Look, Gavin, I really appreciate what you’ve done for me . . .” I started a speech of protest, but he pulled me in close. I could feel the heat from him.

  “What’s wrong? Scared you that you liked it rough?” His hot breath fanned my cheek, and I shivered despite myself.

  My head swam, and I fought to find the words to describe how I felt. I couldn’t answer because he wasn’t wrong, and I wasn’t willing to give him the satisfaction of a yes.

  “I . . .”

  Gavin put his finger to my lips to stop me.

  A black town car pulled up in front of us at the curb, and the driver stepped out. “Mr. Kingsley?”

  Cooper burst through the building’s door at the same moment and looked right at us, huddled close together. He lifted his hand in a small wave to me before turning to walk down the street.

  “I’ve got to go,” Gavin said plainly, and like a switch, the magic was gone and the asshole was back, leaving me alone, staring after him.

  The sense of shame washed over me again and stuck with me as I sat alone on the dirty train, jerking back and forth as we snaked back toward the musty library.

  Back to reality. Back to my mundane, boring life. And in that moment, I knew I wouldn’t say no. Not to Gavin.

  Not to anything he asked of me.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Gavin

  “What the fuck are you two up to?” Quinn’s assessing gaze darted between Cooper and me.

  The hum of the air-conditioning in Quinn’s office was the only source of distraction. It was the end of the day, and ever since Emma strutted out of the office at midday, the day had dragged by at a snail’s pace.

  “Whatever do you mean, brother dearest?” Cooper asked, a smirk on his lips.

  “This pissing match.” Quinn waved his hand between us. “One of you needs to fuck her and get this over with.”

  Cooper’s nostrils flared, and he looked like he was ready to punch something. I felt the same way.

  “Don’t see how that will help,” I muttered under my breath.

  “Then lay claim to her. End this bullshit arrangement. Admit you want her in your life,” Cooper taunted. “I’ll back off.”

  That wasn’t going to happen. At least, not while I still had my wits about me.

  “Not everything ends in death and devastation. Sometimes there are happily-ever-afters,” Quinn said. “Or so I’ve heard.” He forced a smile, and for a second, I wondered if even he believed the shit coming out of his mouth.

  “And when has any of us experienced anything close to that?” I barked.

  My brothers stayed silent.

  “Exactly. Never.”

  “Doesn’t mean it couldn’t happen,” Quinn said.

  “Drop it, asshole,” I warned.

  Quinn rose to his feet, hefting out a sigh as though rising from the chair took a great amount of effort. He suddenly looked much older than his thirty-six years. “Don’t let it affect your work.”

  “Lecture over yet, Dad?” Cooper asked.

  “Long as you two can behave like goddamn adults, yes.”

  “You need to ask Gavin about that,” Cooper said, crumpling his water bottle and tossing it across the room in a perfect arch to land in the wastebasket.

  I rolled my eyes. Lately I felt like I couldn’t do or say anything without facing their scrutiny. Things weren’t always this way. We used to stay out of each other’s way, and we used to mind our own fucking business.

  God, how I missed those days. It seemed like everything had changed, and I was exhausted. Maybe I should take one of those vacations Quinn was always suggesting. Then again, maybe not. Who knew what Cooper would get into while I was gone. Rather not what, but who. That thought shouldn’t bother me so much, yet it undeniably did.

/>   “Just want to be sure you two know what the fuck you’re doing,” Quinn added.

  “Everything’s fine, Quinn. No need to pull the concerned-older-brother act.” I forced a grin, but it felt more like a grimace. I wasn’t sure what had me so on edge. Actually, I was one-hundred percent sure her initials were E.B., but I was trying to ignore that fact.

  “Good.” Quinn nodded. “I just don’t want anything getting in the way of running the business. We can’t afford mistakes.”

  “I quite agree. But, seriously, it’s all good.” Cooper rose to his feet and placed one hand on my shoulder. “Right, brother?”

  I nodded.

  Our meeting was over, and since I had a client meeting to prepare for, I tried to force all thoughts of Emma out of my brain. It was easier said than done.

  Sonja knocked on the frame of my open door. Letting herself inside, she set a stack of manila folders on my desk. “Cooper did very well at the gala. We have three new client requests.”

  “That’s great.” I sifted through the folders. A politician, a professional athlete, and some dude I’d never heard of.

  “There’s something else . . . and I wasn’t sure how you’d want me to handle it.”

  Was that . . . hesitation? Sonja never hesitated. But here she was, biting her bottom lip and looking at me like she had to deliver the world’s worst medical prognosis. She managed the office and handled all client and escort relations.

  My curiosity piqued, I slid into my desk chair, watching her. “What is it?”

  Sonja lowered herself into the chair in front of me. “A client has requested Emma specifically.”

  I shook my head, ignoring the pulse that suddenly jackhammered in my neck. “She’s not even in the database. How’s that possible?”

  She cleared her throat. “He met her at the event with Cooper. Wondered if she was available to attend a wedding with him in Scotland next month.”

  Ignoring the sudden ache in my temples that meant a headache was coming, I shifted in my seat. “That’s . . . no. The answer is no. She’s not available for hire.”

  She nodded. “That’s what I told him. I knew it was some type of private arrangement between you and Cooper, and I don’t mean to pry, but do you really think that’s wise?”

  My temples now full-on throbbing, I took a deep breath. “What do you mean?”

  “Sir, I hope you forgive me if I’m overstepping, but ever since Emma’s sudden entrance into your lives, things between you and Cooper have been different.”

  Fuck. So, it wasn’t just Quinn being an asshole. Sonja had noticed it too.

  Trying to maintain my composure, I asked, “What do you mean?”

  Again, she hesitated. “If she’s become a distraction, maybe it’s best to let her go.”

  I blinked. In all the time Sonja had worked with me, she’d never said a single thing about any of the girls. Not when they failed to show up on dates, not when they quit without notice. Never.

  “You were all for hiring her,” I said, tilting my head. “Why the sudden change of heart?”

  Why would she care if Cooper and I were having some secret competition with the pretty newcomer?

  “I don’t want her to cause any issues between you and Cooper, that’s all. Things have shifted. We can all feel it,” she said, her voice growing softer.

  “Sonja, when have you ever known my brother and I to let a woman come between us?”

  “There’s a first time for everything.” Sonja raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow at me, and I could have laughed if it weren’t for the serious tone to this conversation.

  I reached across the desk and patted the top of her hand. “This is just business. There’s no need to worry.”

  “I do worry about you. All of you, but you especially, Gavin. Ever since . . .”

  “Don’t,” I warned. The next person to bring up her name was getting throat-punched. I didn’t care that Sonja had a vagina. I’d reached my limit on this personal, prying bullshit today.

  She straightened her skirt. “All I’m saying is that if you needed a plus-one for an event, all you had to do was ask.”

  I blinked again, for the first time in my life not sure what to say. Finally, I settled on, “I already ask too much of you.”

  Watching her sit across from me, I studied Sonja for the first time in a long time—maybe ever. Dressed in a tailored skirt suit, with shoulder-length wavy blond hair, she was an attractive, vibrant woman. I recalled from her birthday earlier this year that she had just recently turned thirty-nine, though she didn’t look it. I couldn’t help but wonder if she’d wasted her prime years working long hours to help my brothers and me get our business off the ground.

  If she didn’t work so much, would she be married by now? Maybe even have a little one at home? Probably. I wondered if that was what she wanted. Sonja never talked about her personal life. And despite working long hours beside her, I realized that I didn’t actually know her very well.

  “I care about you too much to drag you into my shit,” I said.

  “I’m here, and the offer stands. Whatever you need.”

  Sonja couldn’t possibly understand my needs. And if she did? she wouldn’t volunteer herself so quickly.

  “Besides, Quinn would have my balls if something ever happened between us that made you not want to work here anymore. You’re too valuable to this place. You keep us all sane.”

  She smiled and rose to her feet. “Okay.”

  I watched her head for the door, hoping I’d merely imagined the odd tension buzzing between us. I had more of that than I could handle already with the distracting Miss Bell.

  “As long as you’re good with everything, then so am I.” She turned and shot me a distracted smile. “I’ve got to go. Cooper asked me to send Emma a new dress for the next event, and I don’t want to forget.”

  With that, she sailed out of the room leaving me staring after her, irritated and a little proud at the same time. Sonja was smart and savvy enough to see through my ruse, and had let loose one final arrow before parting.

  One that landed full-on center mass and stayed lodged there all fucking day as I sat and seethed, imagining the sensual creation Emma would be wearing for my brother.

  Son of a bitch.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Emma

  Another beautiful dress arrived at my front door the following morning, green and lacy and backless. A note attached read:

  Princess, you’ll be the most exquisite work of art in the gallery tonight.

  — Cooper

  Not for the first time, I wondered how he’d felt when he’d seen Gavin and me huddled together outside the office building. Each time I thought of Cooper’s small wave, another roll of guilt took hold of me, and I had to sit down and breathe deeply before I could focus again.

  The truth was that neither of these men ought to be attached to me. I shouldn’t be the one worried about whether I was getting between them, because this had been a deal of their own design. If Gavin wanted to do . . . well, all the things he wanted to do to me, it shouldn’t matter to Cooper.

  But what if it did?

  I could never forgive myself for hurting someone as sweet and charming and nice as Cooper. By rights, he was the sort of man I should have been focused on. And the way he’d kissed me, so tender and delicate? There was a sort of passion there too, wasn’t there?

  Now, in addition to all my worries and concerns about the house and Gavin and the library, I added Cooper to the list. If I didn’t sort things out, and soon, I was going to give myself an ulcer. But I had no time to worry about that.

  By the time afternoon came, I was slipping into my dress and fussing with my hair, getting ready for another night with the man who should have been my perfect match.

  When Cooper arrived, things went as smoothly as they had during our last date. We fell into easy conversation—the scene with Gavin ignored but not forgotten—and
time flew as we headed to the party. Cooper really was sweet and sexy all rolled into one captivating package. In many ways, I knew he would be perfect for me, but the more I realized that, the more I craved the intense connection I shared with the dominating and enigmatic Gavin. The thought made my stomach twist, and not in the butterfly way.

  Soon, the limo was dropping us off on the charming Newbury Street in front of the art gallery. There were only a dozen people or so in the small gallery space enjoying wine and cheese.

  “Are we early?” I asked.

  Cooper chuckled in response and led me through the doorway.

  “Good evening, Mr. Kingsley.” A woman wearing all black with a short blond bob walked eagerly toward Cooper and completely ignored me. I could almost see the dollar signs in her eyes. Cooper gave her his most charming smile.

  “Right this way, please.” The woman led us behind a curtain to a back room with a spiral staircase. “They’re all down there.”

  “After you, princess,” Cooper said, blowing a kiss in the blonde’s direction as a thank-you.

  “Former fling of yours?” I raised my eyebrows as we descended the staircase into the darkness below.

  Cooper laughed. “She’s gay. No worries, I’m all yours.”

  Another twinge of guilt coursed through me, but I ignored it as we stepped into the dimly lit basement of the gallery. My eyes began to adjust and two dozen or more faces appeared in the semi-darkness.

  Most of the guests were well-dressed men in expensive tailored suits, though a few were women in dresses as fancy as my own. Not one of the women looked a day older than thirty.

  Are these all escorts? Does everyone here know that I’m an escort?

  Thinking of myself as an escort was still strange. It felt much more like a friendly outing, beside the fact, of course, that he was paying me to be here.

  “Can I get you a drink?” Cooper asked.

  “Yes, please.” Tonight, I could use the break from my own thoughts.

  Cooper headed to a small table in the corner and grabbed two small glasses of clear liquid, each with what appeared to be a slice of pickle at the bottom. My nostrils burned at the smell.